A conversation from last night

L "aghhh my back hurtsssss" (feel sorry for me)

M "OK seriously, you need to start strengthening your core muscles"

L "stop it, i'm not old, and i've never had back pain before"

M "you've also never been 24 before"

L "(scoffs) maybe my purse is too heavy. i think i need a new purse"

M "you need to start doing sit ups every day. you can get a new purse if you do that for a week straight"

L "DONE!" (sucker)

Psh, girrrrl

Yesterday I told Mitchell that I was sorry for being tired all the time. Cuz really, I'm tired all the time. In response he said, "I slept like ALL day today," and giggled. No longer do I feel bad.

L

The One in Which we Sort-of Try and Readily Fail

You guys. Today we started an 11-day meal plan. It's time things get healthy over here. Here's the thing though, it lets you eat like 8 ingredients TOTAL! Total. Can someone please explain to me how cashews and deli sliced turkey counts as a meal?

Breakfast this morning was a hard boiled egg and strawberries. Doable. CHECK.

Here's when I decided that this was outrageous and I was going to starve and I hated this diet

Then, lunch: roast beef slices and cheese sticks. Uhhh, sure I guess that's real food.

Then I get an email from Mitchell saying, "hey you should wait and start the diet thing when you're not sick anymore". Of course I tell him absolutely not, I can do this!
M-"no really, you can cheat if you want"
L-"nope"
M-"...I might have had some pizza for lunch on accident"

And there was the first fail.

Later on in the day I got another message.

M-"so today I was telling my friends in class about the new diet i'm starting and totally grabbed a sucker and started eating it while i was telling them".

Dieting is hard you guys.

We are quitting.

But since we really do want to eat healthier and we just bought tons of healthy food at Sunflower Market, I think we'll chuck the strict daily plan and eat the healthy food however we want.

Because NOBODY TELLS US WHAT TO DO.

The end.

The Clueless Edition

Listen up. I'm reading Emma. Emma is such a classic. And what better than a literary classic to inspire a 90's teen comedy? The problem here is, I obviously saw the movie Clueless before I read Emma. Duh.

So, like, I know what's gonna happen already in the book, right?

Not that Jane Austen is the most suspenseful writer or anything. I mean, she's no Maeve Binchy. (What, Maeve Binchy is too obscure for you?) (Plus Maeve Binchy is also not a suspense writer)

What was this post about?

Oh yeah, I already know how the book ends so it's taking me forever to read it is the point.

Usually my reading time is in my car at lunch. Lately I've been having nap for lunch though. In the backseat of my car.

There is no point to this post turns out.

Except that today I told Mitchell that my shoulder was out of place again and therefore hurting, and he said, "that's it, it's time for us to go to the gym, you're getting older and need to work out your back muscles"

Or something like that.

Guys, I'm TWENTY-FOUR. If I'm already in decline, heaven help us all.

L

Things my dog is afraid of

This is my dog. His name is Fender. He is scared of a lot of things. Here's a list of some of them:

1) plastic bags
2) plastic water bottles
3) vacuums (how weird a word is vacuum? seriously though-vacuum vacuum vacuum)
4) mountain bikes
5) laundry baskets
6) backpacks (camelbacks in particular)
7) noisy clothing
8) bar stools
9) balloons
10)cell phones
11)any new toy
12)birthday hats
13)hot dog costumes
14)reindeer antlers

Okay those last few are sort of understandable because, how embarrassing for us to force those things upon him.

In summary this dog is scared of basically everything. Which is okay with us because it makes for a super well-behaved pet that will never run too far away or chew the tires of your bike.

Also it gives him this sweet personality, which is okay by us too.

Enough about your dog crazy lady.

L